if you want ‘out’ you have to want out more than feeling good, happy or uplifted. life is not to be dabbled with, life is to be lived. GO and LIVE AWAKE NOW! Dead is coming.

It’s funny how things that seem like a catastrophe in my mind moderate when they are written out.

I was worried about the length, but as I worked on it, it turned into a story with dramatic elements (which I like to read).

If the story of one of my experiences can possibly help one person in the world, I would be happy.

Here is that earlier post: http://raymondburton.com/life/the-secret-of-purpose-and-career/

It is interesting that you put this post up. I have often done things because it was expected, and finding what I do like by accidental happenstance (strange, no?).

Also, a truly horrible feeling is loving your (accidentally found) work and hating where you do it. I have alluded to this situation on your coaching site FLS.

In my former job, I learned a lot, but, over time, I felt that I was being used. I knew for a long time that the job was a dead-end, but I stayed. I loved doing the work, but disliked many of the senior people. Thus, I loved leaving the job, going to the gym, and the weekends. I absolutely dreaded Mondays! But I had bills to pay (yep loans from college (long story here)), and felt fearful about quitting a job without an immediate replacement and reliable salary check.

The job ultimately collapsed. The employer had decided to move in a different direction, without me. I also discovered that I was severely underpaid.
It was a rude, unfair, underhanded, and unjust move, but the die had been cast.

In the pit of despair and disappointment (planning how to survive unemployment (I’m not going to lie, this was a scary thought)), I re-engaged in the job search process. Like you, I am a writer. Where I live, jobs are based on your previous jobs. In the age of frequent job change, employers are not truly in favor of job shifting (like from being an accountant to a public relations professional).

In this research, I was looking for work related to volunteer church work (which I loved, stumbled onto this by sheer accident too). While doing that I found a job that was similar to mine. The job was interesting, in a slightly different field, but the closing date for applications had passed. Because the job was announced, I rushed home and submitted an application.

I was called for an interview two weeks later, interviewed a month later, and accepted the job two weeks after that.

The new job pays better, my co-workers are kinder and humane, and I no longer dread Mondays or workdays.

But, I look with trepidation at the task of cleaning up the wreckage in other areas of my life caused by my decision to remain in a toxic environment for so long.

I am happy that you have found your path though (it seemed like it took lots of trial and error).